“My son will always know about my profession,” says sex worker mom – Revista Crescer | education

Lolla Poltroniere is not the real name of the 38-year-old paulistana who lives in Vinhedo, in the interior of São Paulo, but that is her professional name. According to Lolla, it’s a way to keep her privacy — she’s been working as an escort for six years. Even the prejudice surrounding the profession did not prevent her from fulfilling her desire to become a mother. “The pregnancy was planned. At that time, I went back to my mother’s house, had my son, and 50 days later, I was back at work,” he recalls.

Today, she is a single mother to a boy and guarantees: “Motherhood interferes with any mother’s career. I don’t think being a mate interferes any differently.” “I believe that the truth will never hurt anyone. My son will always know about my profession, in time, but as soon as possible. I have never liked lies, and precisely for this reason, I do not want to be held responsible in the future. You will not only know that the mother is Or be a companion, but you will also learn to respect companions and all women, regardless of profession,” she said, in a video about companion career challenges on YouTube. “My son will know my story,” he said.

Lola is not afraid to show her face and is open about it (Image: Personal Archive)

Lola is not afraid to show her face and is open about it (Image: Personal Archive)

In an interview with CRESCER, she, who is not afraid to talk about it and is interested in showing her face, revealed why she started in the profession, the men who are looking for her, and this reflected bias. paying off!

CRESCER: How and where was your childhood?
Lola Poltronier: My childhood was quiet. I was born and raised in São Paulo until I was eight and then came to Venido, in the interior of the state, where I am until today. My parents divorced when I was 13 years old. Both came from evangelical backgrounds, so I was raised on a traditional religious model.

A: In your youth, what are your plans?
LP: My dream was to study forensic medicine, but the economic and financial conditions of my family did not correspond to this reality. To attend a public college, I had to study in a private institution, but my parents could not afford it. They did not have the money to pay the university fees. So unfortunately that didn’t happen. On the other hand, I’ve always been very attached to the arts, I’ve done ballet classes, theater, jazz, canvas painting, painting…

A: When and how did you become an escort?
LP: I decided to become a buddy in June 2016 after I closed my salon. I ran this hall for three and a half years, but after the crisis, which began after the 2014 World Cup, things started to get complicated. So at the end of 2015 the deal closed. In 2016, I’m still trying customer service at home, but it didn’t work. My republic at the time was not like that home care, Which made me feel frustrated. At the same time, I did not have any kind of relationship: as I worked a lot, I did all the hairdressing, make-up and waxing, and sometimes the salon closed at 2 am. I didn’t have time, so I ended up using dating apps, but the relationships never really developed. The intention of the guys I met online has always been the same: sex. I’m starting to get tired of trying. Therefore, with little money and a diligent search for someone, I decided to combine “useful and interesting” and became a companion.

Lola is the mother of a two-year-old and has worked as an escort for six years (Image: Personal Archive)

Lola is the mother of a two-year-old and has worked as an escort for six years (Image: Personal Archive)

A: There is a lot of bias about the profession, how do you deal with it?
LP: Yes, there is a lot of bias, but I deal with it with my head held high. My neighbors know what I’m doing, but no one has ever approached me to talk about it, they are very conservative people, and so am I. So no one has come to me in six years and fingered and said I was having sex for money. I have always been treated with great respect and have never noticed indifference in treatment, despite it being a small town. I work by appointment and in a very neat and orderly place. I don’t do drugs and I don’t drink. I am a sex worker and not “anyone” who does anything for any money.

A: Who are the men who are looking for you?
LP: Most of them are still committed. But, a couple of years ago, I noticed a huge increase in the number of single men, who don’t want to go through the trouble of finding someone on an app, chatting away, doing that opening… They don’t want to “waste time”, they don’t want to commit to anyone, they They are only looking for sex. This was on the rise.

C: Today you talk about it naturally. Do you know your family and friends?
LP: I’ve always talked about it naturally. my mom knows. I have a sister who, like my dad, is not close, so it’s basically me and my mom. My mother found out about this early because, at that time, I created a professional profile on one of the social networks, which appeared to my mother as a friendship proposal. At that time, she took her cell phone crying and came to interrogate me. I lived with her and left for work. The reaction was the worst, but I made it clear that I was 32 and up until that point I had had sex with men for free and had never benefited from anything. So the shipping started. And so he went. After that, I already had the capital to set up my kit and I left home.

A: You have a son who is about 3 years old. Was the pregnancy planned?
LP: Yes, pregnancy is planned.

A: How was the pregnancy and postpartum period? Do you have a support network?
LP: I decided to stay away from the father of my child, who is still pregnant. At that time, I went back to my mom’s house, had my son, and 50 days later, I went back to work and had all the support from my mom. During pregnancy, I stopped working, because I could not think about sex, all this time I was at home, without any contact with men, only devoted myself to pregnancy. Three months after my son was born, I went back home on my own, rented a new apartment, and life went on.

+ Sex during pregnancy: 9 things that always raise doubts

A: Has motherhood interfered with your profession in any way?
LP: Motherhood is contrary to the profession of any mother, because the child gets sick, they have to stay at home … as if I work as an employee in a bank or in any other area. I do not think that motherhood, as a companion, interferes in a different way.

A: How is your routine? Do you work exclusively as an escort?
LP: I get up and take my baby to daycare and go to my daycare. But I am also investing in another area, which is artistic confectionery. I started from Hobby, in 2018, but due to lack of study and technique, I ended up giving up. Personalized desserts and cakes are a great “bridge” to bring out creativity. I’m still investing, but I aim to live exclusively from artistic sweets in the future. At the moment it is just getting started so I don’t know yet when this will be possible.

A: Is the father actively involved in the upbringing of his child?
LP: My son’s father is not Brazilian. He’s Argentine, works as an international driver and travels through Mercosur, so whenever he can, he makes his visits. But, unfortunately, his profession does not allow him to stay here for long. However, we talk every day, he makes video calls and, as far as possible, actively participates in the life of his son.

A: Do you fear any future judgment on your son because of his profession?
LP: As a mother, we never want our child to suffer. But I always say I created a man, not a potato sack. He will learn to respect people’s choices, as well as the differences between them. We understand that we are all different and that’s okay. Our opinion goes as far as the other begins. He will learn to be respectful and respectful. In my opinion, society would be much better if it were run by women – we would have less prejudice, less violence and less intolerance. But change must come from us, and especially from us, the mothers of the boys.

A: What are Rafeeq’s biggest challenges?
LP: I think she sees yourself as a professional. Many women in this profession hide behind privacy and prejudice so as not to free themselves and not beat their chest and say: “I am a buddy.” Of course, everyone knows their problems, but I always defend: “If not you, who? If not today, then when? You have to be the change.” I thought I’d stay in this profession for a year, but I’ve been working for six years and love what I do. I want to invest in the confectionery industry because it is the profession that I see myself in the future. But when I saw myself as a buddy, my first step was to become a professional. You’ve done a professional rehearsal and set up a structured service site. But, today, the companion’s greatest difficulty, for me, is to see herself as a professional, and the challenge is to end her prejudice. We have difficulties like all professions, but when you put yourself in the market as a professional, everything changes. I never hid behind fake photos. What we have is a fictitious name to preserve our privacy, just as customers like to keep their privacy. So, I think this made my career path and my personal life easier.

Lola said her son will learn to respect her choices (Image: Personal Archive)

Lola said her son will learn to respect her choices (Image: Personal Archive)

A: What would you say to someone who judges you without knowing you?
LP: Everyone knows the truth. I, for example, do not consider my profession a flaw. I serve as an ambassador for one of the most dangerous platforms in the escort business, which strives daily to combat fraud and ideological falsehood, which fights a series of crimes described in the Penal Code, and which strives to empower a profession that attempts to eliminate the prejudice and stigma that have accompanied us for years. Showing my face, my natural body – no plastic surgery – I was a mother. My profession is legal, not a crime. Therefore, I walk side by side with people who think like me and strive to improve their profession. So I don’t need to justify myself or explain it, I just do what my heart says and that’s it.

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