A lawyer for 25 years, she has already collected many cases, fortunes and misfortunes in the country’s courts. As a result of chance, she represented more fathers than mothers statistically. I have no gender bias or prejudice.
I notice that many fathers begin to be so only after a divorce or separation, when they begin to have children on their own without the support of the mother. Some want it to be, some don’t.
We have the “super moms,” those who know everything and only they can do it, reassure them, and teach them, in short, some boring woman in the wells, with a knot beyond their thinking that they are the first to give birth. Here we always encounter problems and inconveniences, because there will always be a piece of clothing missing, or a dessert allowed outside working hours, or a more radical walk in the eyes of a wise lioness. Here too, we have some parents who are just giving up…
We have the “caregivers”, who don’t care if a child only eats cake and ice cream, walks without sunscreen, and doesn’t do homework, because that’s at mom’s house. So this is someone who will take care of stomach aches, high fever, sleep-inhibiting agitation, and write the justification for school.
I remember with tenderness the case of Ricardo, whose only problem was the alimony and the bills which the mother attributed to the mansion, ignoring that she and her partner also had their share of consumption. He referred to his children’s stepfather as “whom I have to thank,” because the kids love him and spend more time with him than with their father.
Or Francisco, who raised three girls with their mother away for years in a yoga and meditation retreat, learning how to manage meals, supermarket promotions, special educational needs, harassment, and premenstrual syndrome, always in triplicate.
The Miguel case, in which a mother with great difficulty copes with the jealousy and tantrums of her new husband, allowing her to physically punish the children, creating conflicts that did not exist before, erasing herself from her role as a mother of passion. for her new role. woman.
Another Miguel, a devoted father to children, but a perfect fool, in order to please his new wife, is blinded by jealousy and envy. PreviousLet her write the answers of the mother of the sons, and blindly obey her commands, so that she ceases to be with her daughters and comes to an irreversible whirlpool of litigation.
Vasco, father of a sick and distinguished child, about to grow up, accompanied, but with a mother’s family, of the “good guys” pedigreewho does everything to hide and reduce reality and moves from one doctor to another whenever he is told what he does not want to hear.
Just as Joao is the father of a completely helpless and long-lived child, his mother wants him to imprison her and suffer with her, even if he sends medical certificates justifying not opening the door and receiving the child.
Paolo who has achieved his dream of fatherhood with great difficulty, and who finds himself embroiled in cases of domestic violence and sexual abuse of a minor, is a complete liar, thus going years without seeing the child.
Jose clings to a colorful and totally dysfunctional friendship that elicits sexual abuse, and then, wary of court, goes months without first seeing the minor, then the ordeal of attendant visits, merely because a troubled person yells the abuse.
Court warnings, infrequently, lead to extremely unfair attitudes to parents who are forbidden to live with their children, children who are shielded, and completely lenient protections for some mothers (usually these) and some institutions.
We also have others, those for whom fatherhood is a burden, who think that paying child support is giving money to mothers, and that they are the ones who have to educate their children, and they just want them not to bother them.
Kids don’t come with instruction books, but parents should, and do it well.
Well, it would be good for courts to give parents codes of conduct when they come to organize responsibilities, with strict and specific rules.
Then, much later, I would say sensitivity and common sense will take care of the rest.
Thus, parents should prioritize their children and figure out how to divide their feelings towards the other parent and keep them in the archive.
Incidentally, they are represented by reasonable attorneys who try to make their clients see that the best interests of the children prevail.